Annoyance

Some annoying relatives just stopped by.

And by “just” I mean, like, 5 mintues ago.

I am quite pissed off now. Simply because they pulled up milliseconds before my mother and I were heading out the door to go down to the beach and swim.

See, I crave swimming. I haven’t gone in, maybe, 5 days and it pains me. Why? Well, simply because I am fat. Fat fat fat fat fat. And when I go down to the beach I don’t lounge around the shore, slathered in sunscreen, begging to become bacon (like some of the bleached blonde tourists here), nor do I gouge on icecream etc. No, I swim. Not only because that’s what a bathing suit is for, but because in that hour and a half of swimming…I feel…weightless and for me, that’s a very big thing.

It’s just…

I dunno.

No one wants to go swimming with me, or no ones around to ask when I want to go. I feel I need someone with me to…justify this large mass of flesh taking up space in the lake. So when I finally get to go, I’m so freakin’ elated and overjoyed that almost nothing can get me down from cloud 9, or 10, or even 11.

So when these relatives showed up (now) 20 minutes ago, I felt…betrayed and extra fat.

Hell, I don’t even know how they’re related to us!

No one tells me anything around here!

All I know is that they vacation in our hick-town every summer and every summer the entire family unit is on the lookout for them so we can avoid all contact with them. Mostly because the father, or son, or whatever the hell he is is CRAZY loud!

And whenever we do end up running into them, we always invite them over and they never come to visit our house!

So, of course, the year we have yet to see them at the beach, they decide to come over, unannounced and unwanted (in my opinion) to visit.

I can’t wait for them to leave, since then my father will do his world famous “you girls were rude and unsociable” speech to my little sis and I, ‘cause we’ve sealed ourselves in our rooms and haven’t even said ‘hello’ yet. In fact, I’ve sworn not to take off my bathing suit. As I see it: since they stole my weight-free time from me, then they get to see me and all of my pounds and curves and bulges, uncensored (well, except for the bathing suit itself). That is, if I ever leave my room.

And mom and I are going out of town tomorrow, so no swimming then either. Out of town to visit that hellish older sister of mine whom hates me and is hated by me. Lovely.

Fat, useless and hated. Man, I feel like a million bucks!